Mindless Mods of Hyperianism

Marsh Gas said, “The chat has lost its collective mind … I don’t even know what I’m looking at.”

Always reassuring to know that the mindless moderators have no clue what they’re moderating. Aren’t these fucking cretins supposed to set the tone and the expected level of quality?

Bitchell said, “WTF? I’m sitting here feeling crazy.”

Er, isn’t that your normal state, Bitchell? You surely can’t imagine you’re sane! You left Planet Sane decades ago. Maybe even in prehistoric times.

Marsh Gas said, “Some of them sound like they’re using a random esoteric speech generator.”

Mate, haven’t you watched your own Hyperian Plagiarism videos? For that matter, haven’t you watched “Morgue”? Is that guy a deep fake bullshit bot?

Bitchell said, “I can’t follow this.”

Just like you can’t follow ontological mathematics.

Bitchell said, “And I’m really sleepy.”

You’ll get all the sleep you want, Bitchell – when you’re in jail!

Phillip Shope, the back end of the human centipede, said, “Roberta makes NO sense sometimes.”

Roberta makes no sense EVER. Just like all Hyperians.

Bitchell said, “[Roberta has] no clue. Roberta has very little cheese on her cracker.”

But certainly enough to make it as one of the highest profile Hyperians, right Bitchell? It’s not as if you would ever do your job and moderate her out of Hyperianism. Can’t possibly interfere with Rebhahn’s grifting operation, can you?

It seems that Phillip Centipede stopped Roberta Singer from getting on that plagiarism course of his. Sheez!

And Phillip C doesn’t like Dark Remus (or is it Light Remus now?). Funny how Remus hangs around when everyone hates him!

And who is Moondog? In the end, all these Hyperians nutjobs blend into one Super-Nutjob.

All of the Hyperians, especially Phillip the Centipede, are super excited about the new Jeffrey Dahmer series, where they hope they will learn more about necropants. They’re all going to be wearing them for “Shadow Season”.

Rebhahn sends out special-edition necropants to his top donors, made out of Allie Torgensen’s ample excess flesh. Don’t worry, she has plenty to spare. The supply of necropants will never run out! Slim necropants pickings from Rebhahn himself, though. We think he himself is a pair of necropants brought to life during a failed evangelical spell to cast out the Devil. Instead, the cretins conjured the Devil, as a vegan, non-binary pair of necropants suffering from RTS (or some shit like that).

Mark Wonderpoop has to wear especially snug necropants to stop all his wonder poops escaping and maybe destroying the universe. Someone – was it Rebhahn – actually speculated that one of Mark Wonderpoop’s wonder poops caused the Big Bang. We’re agnostic on that. We suspect that the Big Bang was caused by one of Torgensen’s super-rants when she called the Feds to have God arrested for hate crimes against non-binaries.

Well, anything is possible with hyperaware World Shapers, right?!

Didn’t you see the pic of Torgensen sitting in the toilet bowl? That was her squeezing out the HOLOS right there.

Torgensen said, “Hey you big beautiful monads! Keep your chin up! Remember we’re not going anywhere. If this was all real it would be settled in an adult manner but it’s not. It’s all full of crap and ran on fear and jealousy. Grown ass adults don’t settle things this way. We as hyperians have jobs, families, and a life in the real world where these people just don’t exist. The echo will fade! Let’s keep doing our own thing because we don’t have the time like they do for this crap.

Ad astra!

Now I gotta go to work lol”

Says the fucking crazed nutjob who phoned the FBI, along with the rest of her mentally ill gang. Yeah, real fucking adult, Torgensen. Hyperians have the mental age of five years old. What is their actual game? – it’s to go on PLAGIARIZING OUR WORK. That’s it.

There’s nothing else. HYPERIANISM IS OVER. It’s finished.

Torgensen, the acclaimed dolphin whisperer, quoted someone saying, “your 30s are for unlearning all the conformity you picked up in your teens and 20s and getting back to the weirdo you were as a kid.”

You never stopped being a total weirdo, Torgensen. That’s your whole fucking problem. Daddy issues, right? That’s what your pegging friend Rebhahn said!

What is that weird as fuck thing you keep saying? Loppy lumps? WTF! Fucking grow up, Torgensen. Stop believing in unicorns, you maniac. Fucking unicorns and tarantulas. WTF!

Get some more candy down your gob, fatso. Didn’t you used to do “fitness” videos. FFS! Get a grip.

Never forget the “triadic perspective”: 1) BULLSHIT, 2) TOTAL BULLSHIT, and 3) ABSOLUTE BULLSHIT. You have reached the highest level, Torgensen. You have reached the level where you can’t even smell your own bullshit.

By the way, Torgensen, we’re totally FINE and we’re going nowhere. But thanks for asking. As for you, you’re going to jail. No need to thank us. You did it to yourself!

Diarmuid Russell said of Rebhahn, “Oh the hair is not looking great today, it looks a little frazzled.”

That denotes the end of Hyperianism! Imagine all the Weird Women of Hyperianism not being able to comment on THE HAIR (apparently called “The RACHEL”!) and whether their god is getting enough fluids. You know he drinks blood, right?!

AD DISASTRA